parkersanity

The Bedtime Blues

Well, I am feeling back to 100% now so praise God for that! Unfortunately, I have the bedtime blues. Things with Ewan have taken a downturn. I am hoping that this is the darkness before the dawn. We hit a few setbacks...

Last night I had to teach my Bradley class and after I laid Ewan down for bed he got out. I excused myself quickly, said a quick prayer that I would just need to lay him down only one time, and put him back in bed. Well, apparently I am supposed to be learning about patience because Ewan got back out of bed. I can't teach my class and train him to stay in bed so he got to join me. A 2 year old extrovert's dream come true!! Thankfully he was not very distracting and my class was very sweet about it. The rest of the night wasn't too bad--Ewan got up around 12:30 and did the jack-in-the-box thing about 10 times and got up a little before 7 this morning. Not too bad except he went to bed 2.5 hours late and was running on fumes this morning.

So then we come to nap time. From 12:30-3:00 I put him back in bed over and over and over and over (somewhere between 200-300 times). It was a contest to see who is more stubborn. Eventually when Isaac woke up from his nap I got Isaac up and put Ewan in Isaac's crib. Ewan was asleep within 10 minutes. I woke him up about an hour later because is was 4:30 and I wanted him in bed as close to 7 as possible.

We have done LOTS of verbal rehearsals on rewards he gets for staying in bed but he just has to test the waters. It is almost 8pm now and bedtime has been a battle. He hasn't come out of his room in the last 7 minutes or so but I think he is camped out on the floor of his room in front of the door on top of his blankets. Maybe he will fall asleep there...sigh...I hope this is the worst of the night.

I really need a good night's sleep tonight as lifting a 34 lb. kid over 200 times in one day is pretty exhausting on the muscles--not to mention my heart! I can't even begin to tell you how many times I prayed for patience, love, peace, submission. The sad thing about it all is that I long to shower him with praise and rewards but I can't. My love for him is just the same regardless of whether he obeys or not but I would rather show him tender love than tough love sometimes.

What is hard about it all is that Jon is not home and I feel like I am dealing with this by myself. He isn't here to switch shifts with me or trade sleep. Sometimes it makes it hard to believe that this is one of the costs of ministry! In my mind I know the Lord with with me but my heart is having a hard time rejoicing from this challenge. It does make me thankful that Isaac LOVES being in his bed and going to sleep though. I know not to take that for granted now!

I suppose for now I will pray without ceasing and practice rejoicing in the Lord.